This idea came to me the other day. I had woken up in a grumpy mood. I had been waking up and listening to positive affirmations on YouTube, like this video. But this morning, I didn’t.

Instead, I let the present reality, feeling pain from a recent shoulder surgery, get to me. I thought (I’m embarrassed to write this) that I hated the life I have been living, suffering and not seeming to get ahead. Now, you have to understand I typically never use the word hate. I don’t like it. It has so much power behind it. But here I was, thinking that horrible word. I’m sharing this because I’m sure others get pissed off at their life too.

I stopped myself from thinking that in an instant and asked myself, “How do you love your life?” I didn’t allow myself to stay in the muck too long, which was great.

But I needed to know how do you love your life?

I mean, some people are happy and love their life. I’m sure of it. I had been struggling for so long to have a happy life that the concept seemed pretty foreign to me. Then, the simplest thought changed my mindset. I have a choice.

The choice that day was to stay feeling sorry for myself for being in pain, worrying about money and how to change my financial situation to do what I want to do, and beating myself up for not working harder. Or I could give myself grace, which is what I did. I thought I was doing the best that I could, and that’s good enough. All of a sudden, my life didn’t seem so bad.

I was able to think about the good things like having a wonderful husband, a house that protects us, food that sustains us, and comforts like good shoes and a new mattress. I didn’t compare myself to anyone. I just came up with all sorts of things that I am thankful for, and my mindset shifted to my life isn’t perfect but it’s pretty good.

Those of us who carry far too much weight on our shoulders need a break. Let’s start focusing on how we contribute to loving our lives.

Do we take action doing the things that bring us happiness or do we complain? Are we giving ourselves time to get in touch with who we are, or are we rushing through life and blaming someone else for it?

The choices are there. It’s time to make a decision and stick to it.

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Here are some ways to love your life:

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Appreciate all you have. Think of five things that you are grateful for. Just five. It’s not that much, but once you think of five, you get on the grateful/love wavelength and start to appreciate more and more things. Before you know it, gratitude will come easy and stop any worry, envy, or jealousy.

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If you’re unhappy, figure out why and do something about it. Nothing cures sadness like action.

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Stop comparing your life with others. That’s one of the big reasons why we aren’t in love with our lives. We think others are better off and have a wonderful life, and we want that, too. By focusing on our lives instead, we get to make decisions about what we like, not what someone else has or does. The saying “Comparison is the thief of joy” by President Theodore Roosevelt is true.

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Do what you love. Make the time. Invest in yourself. You are worth it.

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Thank you for reading this. If you have any different ideas on how to love your life, I’d love to hear them in the comments below.

To loving your life,

Francesca