With each choice we make, we move in a direction that either leads us down the right path to happiness or allows us to learn a lesson.

When we bitch and moan about problems going on in our lives, we’re taking the path of “hoping we learn a lesson.” But that isn’t always so. I know for myself it’s taken me a very long time to be aware of all the times I’m complaining. Notice when you complain about something. Try it for one day and see what you experience. It could be anything from not being able to bend down to tie your shoe to the garbage guys left the can on the street. Take stock.

Here’s why.

Complaining does two things: it can make us angry and feel like we have no control over our lives, or it can create an awareness that we deserve something better. Pay attention to the complaints, and you’ll see a pattern. For me, it’s I deserve something better.

The lesson we will learn following our complaint trail is that we need to flip to gratitude for a healthier perspective and get on the path where all roads lead to happiness. I know it probably sounds wishy-washy, but it’s true. When we feel gratitude, it shifts something inside. For me, I feel more in control of my life. If I choose to feel gratitude, I’m choosing to feel happiness.

So, how did we get here? Here. Where we are right now. Was it all about choices? Is that how it happened? Was it that one choice led to another, led to another, and here we are today? That’s part of it, but another part is the subconscious mind’s hold over our destiny. Our conscious mind has to become aware of our thoughts in order to change the subconscious mind.

Here’s an example. I’ve known since I was a child that I was special, unique, and different. When I was on a stage to sing or sang a song I wrote, or wrote the blog or my books, I had this feeling that I could only describe as peace, and that’s where I have to be. But anxiety-inducing thoughts took over, and I heard my father’s voice saying I can’t make money with music or my mother telling me writing is a hobby and I can’t make money from it. Those toxic and very defeating negative comments went into my subconscious mind and, combined with other toxic and damaging messages, formed a self-sabotaging mindset. So, even though I believed I was able to earn a living doing what I love (writing and singing), I didn’t do the action part to support that belief. Why? Because the subconscious mind believed a different story, one where I would just fail anyway, so why bother? How awful, right?

It’s been an uphill battle my entire life to get where I desire to be. I think good thoughts and choose better, but all it takes is to be in the presence of certain people, and my mind flips a switch to “not good enough” in an instant, and I cease action toward my goals. The lesson I need to learn is how to deal with certain people and still be okay if I choose to keep them in my life. It’s a delicate decision.

The here we live in is a reflection, a compilation, of our entire lives. What we thought before, we brought into our lives today. I used to think that notion wasn’t always true, but I’ve since proven myself wrong because it’s correct.

Do this for a week. Think about the life you want to live. The absolute “this life rocks” life. Imagine (visualize) what it looks like and feels like. If you focus solely on those thoughts and not self-defeating ones, things that are geared toward the life we desire will start to happen, and it will astound you. It’s amazing. It’s happened to me and continues to happen to me the more I focus on the life I choose.

So, my goal is to think to myself in five years, How Did I Get Here? And know the choices I made and the work I put in focusing on positive thoughts led me to my ideal life. I see awesome things in the future, but I see awesome things now, too. You need to see it now to make tomorrow happen the way you want. If you complain about stuff, you stay stuck. Grease yourself with an open mind and believe you can change your life to one where you don’t complain. But hey, there may be people out there who just love to complain. If that’s their thing, so be it, but I don’t want to be around someone who always does that. I’d rather surround myself with people who think like me – who believe life can be everything we want – and more!

So, the gist is where we are today is a result of our mind’s beliefs. Change the belief, and you change your life. It’s as simple as that.

Thank you for reading this. I know it may come across as a deep-thinking one, but this is what I think about and want to share it with others. I know what has worked for me, and if someone benefits from my ideas, I’m helping to make the world a better place.  🙂

To Leading the Journey,

Francesca