Anything we do one time is not going to be done great. We have to keep doing things over and over, and then before you know it, it’s become something easy.

The problem arises when we think about what we want to change, do, or be, and fear barges in to start the doubts. Even though we didn’t welcome fear, there it is, making trouble and keeping us stuck. We begin to question, “Am I doing the right thing? I can’t do this. It’s too hard. What if this happens? How can I do this by myself?” Oh, the problems that fear causes!

How did fear get into our lives if we didn’t want it there? Because we didn’t put it there. Someone else did. We took on the fear of our parents, siblings, friends, co-workers, etc. They happily shared their fears with us to release their burden of being the only one carrying around that fear. They thought they were being generous and responsible by giving us their fears and insecurities. They wanted to protect us. Protect us or control us?

I remember going to the Christmas show at Radio City Music Hall as a kid to see the Radio City Rockets and the movie Mame with Lucile Ball. My mother took me to the bathroom and told me to keep my legs away from the sides of the stall because someone would grab them. I was terrified! I thought arms were going to come under the door and pull me out! After that, whenever I was in a public restroom as a kid, I thought my days were numbered. Eventually, I outgrew the bathroom stealing terror when I did what was hard to do what was easy, and that was forgetting what my mother had told me.

The hardest part about getting to the easy stuff is doing the action to get there. Just do the thing that you think you can’t do. Sounds easy, I know, but sometimes it’s more complicated than it sounds.  That’s why a lot of us give up. I’m sure we’ve all heard the expression, “It’s always dark before the light.” It means that what we don’t know or don’t do won’t get better until we face it and deal with it, and then the light will shine. Let’s get out of the dark.

If you think about the people who have succeeded, whether it’s professional athletes, actors, musicians, business people, doctors, or anyone who has found success in their calling doing what they want to do, they all started at the beginning. They took a chance on themselves, knowing they had what it takes to go from novice to expert with hard work. And they all learned through experience. When we tackle the hard stuff now, we set our lives up to live more effortlessly in the future.

No matter what we want for ourselves, the first step always takes place in our minds. We have first to see ourselves having the thing, and then we can take action to make it so. Athletes do it all the time when they visualize themselves attaining a goal. They see themselves shooting the basket or making the putt before they ever get on the court or green. We can do the same thing with our lives.

After you see yourself doing the thing in your mind, take action. Do something to get that thing. What we think about becomes real. So, if you’re optimistic and believe you can have, be, or do whatever you would like, you will achieve that. It does take hard work and discipline to focus on those thoughts. I know it’s tough to do, especially in the world we live in today with constant negativity from the news, pessimistic people (who watch the news) and the Internet.

When we do what is hard, like doing a 21-day news fast (a book I read suggested that), the reward is having an easier time dealing with life’s heaviness and pessimism. Believe it or not, the news carries more negativity than positivity. I don’t know how journalists or broadcasters can live a happy life unless they have some secret on how to turn off their minds to all the negative stuff they deal with at work. You have to be a certain kind of person for that.  Heck, maybe some don’t care. Either way, you have to be pretty tough to combat all that stuff.  I know we need to know what’s happening in the world; don’t make it too concentrated in one day. Like getting some sun: a little is good, but too much, and you’re asking for trouble.

Taking the easy way out usually comes back to haunt us. If we don’t take care of our bodies and abuse them, eventually, our bodies will break down, and we’ll be in ill health. But if we do what is hard, like taking time to exercise and eat healthier, we’ll feel better. Let’s face it: Life is a lot easier when you can walk up and down the steps without breathing heavily or dealing with a debilitating disease. I’m still a work in progress with this and that’s okay.

The bottom line is in order to live that extraordinary life we crave, we have to put in the work to get there. And generally speaking, we always feel better when we do that. I’ve heard some jest about walking away from a hard life to live on a beach and drink pina coladas all day. That would get old and not give us much after a short while. It’s in our nature to keep moving forward and striving for something better. We deserve a happy, prosperous life, and that can happen by taking part in how we get there. The driver sees much more than the back seat passenger snoozing. Wake up! There’s a life to live out there!

Thank you for reading, and if you have a comment, I’d love to hear it.

To an easy life,

Francesca