I learned a lot about how men think from my husband. Women and men see things differently.  It’s just the way it is. So, I thought I’d have a little fun and show what we need to know about the opposite sex.

Some general differences:

MEN                                                                                                                                                       

Likes clearly defined instructions.

WOMEN

She’s busy with 19 different things that she gives broad instructions so she can get back to what she is doing. She might skirt over the issue by asking in a roundabout way, but know exactly what she means.

Example: “Honey, I’m feeling tired today. Would you mind picking up the slack?”

The guy has no clue what to do because he doesn’t know what the “slack” is.

What the guy needs to hear:

“Honey, please pick up the kids at soccer practice, empty the dishwasher, set the table, and help the kids with their homework. I’ll be home at 5:45 pm to start dinner.”

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Clearly defined instructions help communication, and everyone wins. 

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MEN         

Likes things simple.

WOMEN

Since women wear many different hats (with family, jobs, kids, pets, finances, household chores, etc.), they could explain a simple thing ten different ways and could still go on and on about it.  When she does this, the man checks out, thinks about anything else, and nods his head in agreement with no clue what’s being said.

Example: “So, I saw my friend Jane today at the gym. You know, the one that has black hair and always wears something yellow. She’s getting a divorce from her eight-year marriage. Her husband wants to move to Cuba and make cigars. Can you believe that? They have like five cats. One of the cats is going to have kittens soon.”

The guy hears maybe I should be going to the gym, and then he wants a cigar.

What a guy needs to hear:

“So, my friend is getting a divorce.”

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Easy conversations get the ball rolling and keep the interest of both parties.

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MEN     

Has clear-cut priorities and tackles them one at a time.

WOMEN

Might put 12 things on her to-do list for the day and multi-tasks, getting a little of this done and a little of that done. The to-do list flows into the next day because there’s not enough time to get through everything.

Example: “I have a million things to do today, and I don’t know how I’m getting done with everything.  Could you handle something else today?”

The guy hears I should play the lottery to win a million dollars so I can lay on a beach somewhere and chill all day.

What a guy needs to hear:

“Honey. Here’s a list of things I need you to handle today.”

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Writing things down makes it easier to accomplish. 

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MEN     

Prefer to be asked one thing at a time.

WOMEN

Likes to be diplomatic and give many choices to let others make a decision.  If a woman gives too many choices, the cranks in a guy’s head might start smoking from too much work deciphering what he wants to eat.

What a guy needs to hear:

“Honey, we’re having meatloaf tonight.”

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Keep choices simple. 

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MEN     

Lives day to day.

WOMEN

She lives months in advance when she has an important event coming up and needs to buy a new outfit and shoes, get her hair and nails done, and other essential tasks. She’s overwhelmed, feeling like she’ll never lose that extra weight to fit into the ideal size she wants.

“Honey, I need you to keep May 11th open for an awards ceremony for the beauty industry. It’s going to be black tie.”

What a guy hears: I hope I have to work that day.

What a guy needs to hear:

“Honey, I know it’s a way off, so I’m not going to bog you down with details but keep May 11th open. It’s important to me.

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Living in the moment allows us to pay better attention to one another.

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Both men and women deserve respect and acknowledgment for what they accomplish every day. This is not about whether the woman’s or the man’s way of thinking is any better. It’s about understanding one another and making more of an effort to communicate better.

Thank you for reading this, and if you have any other ideas or experiences, please share!

To knowing each other,

Francesca