I visited my aunt over Christmas and heard her say that time goes by so fast when you’re older.  I processed it and realized I guess I’m “older” too because it feels like time flies by for me. I make a weekly schedule and cannot believe it’s Monday already or whatever day, and the thing has to get done again (like a chore.) Being an overthinker, I tried to understand this phenomenon that wasn’t this way when we were kids.  Christmas seemed to take forever to get here. Summers off seemed like it was such a long time.  What happened?

Our lives are more complicated; it’s as simple as that.

As kids, we didn’t have so much to think about or worry about. Things were taken care of for us, like paying bills, and being responsible for a family, house, cars, etc. Our minds were open and receptive. Right? Children’s brains are like sponges; they absorb everything, the good and the bad. Most likely, we didn’t know about a lot of stuff like money worries or being exhausted from doing too much. Ah, the joy of ignorance and bliss.

Sure, we can think that. It’s easy to fall into the “I’m not a kid anymore; time flies because I’m so busy” trap to justify time going by so fast. I think what children have that we, as adults, seem to have lost is a sense of peace in the present moment. And if you think about it, the present moment is all we really have; ergo, we can make each moment whatever we want it to be.

Wow, seems like such a no-brainer, right? It’s not, though. Focusing on the present moment is challenging, yet kids can do it effortlessly. Why? We didn’t worry so much as children or care much about other people’s thoughts. We lived in the present. We were allowed to get away with acts that would be frowned upon if an adult did it, such as twirling in the middle of a store aisle. If a five-year-old did it, we would smile and think it was cute. If an adult did it, they are judged as being loco.  I am not advocating we start twirling in public places; I was using that as an example of how a child wouldn’t care what anyone thought or worry about being judged.

Guess what all that thinking (worrying) does as an adult? It makes time go by faster. You are replacing the present moment view with a replay of old news. Each time you think about something over and over, you begin to live in an altered reality. I mean seriously.  Let’s say you and a six-year-old go to the same place for a half hour. It’s a park. As an adult, I would guarantee that after you take in the natural beauty, you start pondering stuff going on in your life, wondering if you have the time to be in a park for a half hour without being with a child who is playing in the park. There’s no longer a beautiful green hue on the leaves or energy felt from everything, recharging us.  We are back in the loop, and before you know it, time passed like that (I’m snapping my fingers.)

Meanwhile, the six-year-old feels like they were at the park for a long time. It was awesome! They took in everything. Played on all of the playground equipment and felt free. Why is there a taboo for adults who want to play on playground equipment (if it’s big enough) and get exercise, the blood flowing?

I’ll tell you what, perverts put a negative spin on it. Seriously. An adult male goes into a park and rides a swing. Mothers guard their kids or leave. Sad, but we need to forgo the solo park experience, you know, for the kids.

We don’t need a park to be free and in the present moment. We can be in the present moment anywhere, at any time. And then the present moment allows us to make time last longer. Our lives don’t feel rushed. We can control our lives by living in the present moment.

Here’s how to get used to living in the present moment:

1. What do you see, feel, smell, hear or taste? Think about it. (This can be listening to music, meditating, or praying.)
2. Focus on your breath. Breathe in and out. What does it feel like? You don’t have to take deep breaths. Just feel what it feels like to breathe in and — breathe out.
3. Create something. When you are making something, you are living in the present moment. You need to focus and pay attention.
4. Interact with people, animals, or a special inanimate object you love (my e-bike, “I say “Hello Mickey,” when I walk by it.) By doing this, boom, you are in the present moment.
5. Feel gratitude. We are living in the present moment when we appreciate what is around us in our lives.

You get to be in the awesome present moment when you do any of these things. If we tried harder to be in the present, we would feel more, do more, experience more, melt stress, and feel more joy. We get to control our present moment. If you allow someone else into your thoughts that’s not right in front of you or a worry that is not going on in the present moment, you are not living in the present.

Living in the present will open up your life. Worrying will not help anything. Action helps. If something is bothersome, do something about it, or if it is out of your control, stop thinking about it and focus on something you control.

And the final great thing about living in the present moment is that we get to control how we feel. I choose to think I feel great instead of thinking about the aches and pains in my body. I override the negative with a positive spin. Did you ever notice when you are feeling pain and you run into someone you don’t know that well or someone you haven’t seen in a long time, you miraculously feel great? That is present-moment thinking at its finest. You are focused on the person and do not want to share what ails you and maybe feel great like you did when you last saw that person when you were twenty. Our minds can control how we feel.

Hey, I’m not a guru, but I’ve been doing this (present-moment living) for a while, and it’s helped me. I have found I don’t complain as much and am more pleasant to be around. I laugh more and find more things interesting than wrong. I appreciate people and things. I love more deeply. That’s the benefit of living in the present moment.

Try it!

Thank you for reading this. I appreciate your time, and I hope I have offered you something of value for it.

To a life of happiness (because that’s what matters the most!),

Francesca